 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ; h8 u _9 L" w
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% ?4 L, g+ {# N. T6 g& uTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks./ T6 T6 @1 L8 s+ X
' z. S' {% [7 u* {' w- Q# ~Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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; m* @3 [0 E5 n# RIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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s8 I: b# C y5 m' E+ A- _. `0 {9 wLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- & L) j0 `9 n0 g0 l l* s( r
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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5 M( f% b9 y( ~; m" wGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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! _; X1 k: k4 k1 T6 ~6 x) KWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. " j4 t$ g* t- \, V+ K+ k
1 e3 K7 @" o: P7 q5 {2 l9 i$ mWash your hair again to make sure it's clean. v E# K6 ?% ~" p
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..: x0 I4 a- s% w) f
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. $ R" A& r3 {1 M5 E- M7 w4 v; k/ `+ m; ?
& w, Q9 I& i+ m. y4 RWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. " F% H3 r) m4 f7 Z. |9 L' j
, ?2 E; V2 N+ _. |Rinse conditioner off hair.
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. D7 S4 K) z) ], B, e; I. W4 XShave armpits and legs.$ `0 p9 N/ W, S5 G+ j6 P' q: e
# s1 [5 G2 v# e7 G; A- s6 o1 pTurn off shower.4 i, A* ?# J! a
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.- v7 Q7 y: Y' m/ E% \
: P5 m# C, L& Y% s6 FSpray mold spots with Tilex. & E2 o6 A, F, G
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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; d: g' F# f- n# N0 |, [' B( q7 J$ ^Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. ! x# C0 f9 ]. I: K, D% g
, P; o8 x0 b- l+ h! z+ Z4 LReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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9 ?! k' U& H; V8 ^3 N/ F5 BTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 9 ?6 T1 Y$ f7 U
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Walk naked to the bathroom.. C. ?8 {! Q8 W
5 P& {( v; r$ I0 e' Z! oIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. + d v/ x; Z Y8 R( y
; @ ~' E: S+ I0 o! j6 M {3 dLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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: B a. I4 [( f4 YAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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& p4 o+ } P$ {8 _7 s' q: TGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. + y+ o9 Z3 b, ^
- j _! ], r9 s4 u. F0 RBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. % W$ S, P% q% Q% ?; S6 b4 E" C4 X
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 7 _# d( A) l: c/ O
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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: b0 O1 O5 ^9 g3 M; x) d) jWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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4 E8 P1 h! [/ JWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ) e Y% |, i7 p% U6 ~
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Pee.
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- F' M) e# p) i- K2 dRinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.. M K+ E6 C/ w5 p6 |* Q1 y
* x. u' p' @# y# y0 d4 {Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 6 N( k/ f: o# a5 L2 J
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. 6 ~# U; {* Y( w+ V) m2 K
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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3 d* Z5 x$ p3 U _Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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0 p% c) [5 ~3 n1 i/ mThrow wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
