鲜花( 152) 鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?4 H5 b; ]; S/ M% j; E
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Let's face it
+ h3 B+ H6 W; CEnglish is a stupid language." w- A. E0 |7 l: q! ]7 `
There is no egg in the eggplant
& H F% w; H& A% \9 p" ENo ham in the hamburger
N! z+ A0 K5 ?/ g& q" T7 O* kAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.0 k- e2 B0 @& C, L+ b
English muffins were not invented in England9 r" o+ f; @: @1 b7 m
French fries were not invented in France.' g- {7 G" P& I$ u) c, z9 h
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We sometimes take English for granted
) a3 ^! C' o, S5 x/ w3 [, k) |$ V2 U: bBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
, ?( J7 j+ Y l5 S) J% _3 tQuicksand takes you down slowly
* X. H0 c, j9 o) ?7 Q' \, p6 T% v& o! @Boxing rings are square
" e0 X& M/ y* U' P- SAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.7 Y3 s F# M6 }
If the plural of tooth is teeth' R9 T) Y9 E0 Z; D) i
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
3 H8 t+ A3 f4 wIf the teacher taught,
! y ]! f: M$ Q( L& \Why didn't the preacher praught.& z$ i$ v2 y" I3 C/ Y: P; B
5 g. @7 W' G2 M" IIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
3 Q# I% k6 ]/ PWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?% ?8 O/ w7 s; S. a& H- m) w7 l/ v
Why do people recite at a play
$ h5 X/ z- _1 ^: w/ M/ Y6 FYet play at a recital?" J7 \- ~. u: a' H8 G
Park on driveways and6 f/ k: W! O; ^7 d+ B+ \% c6 D, @
Drive on parkways
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/ l1 A/ N5 _5 @You have to marvel at the unique lunacy5 T" @6 b: V& x5 q7 W% Q( m
Of a language where a house can burn up as+ u9 A7 B4 m0 e! V
It burns down( ~ C$ A- J* @. U" c
And in which you fill in a form
/ S' q0 K7 u( T9 [' YBy filling it out
& S% w W* {+ P6 i3 F, \) `And a bell is only heard once it goes!3 a# |8 N8 x- S8 _0 l5 E4 }
. e' F/ `7 d3 N! S5 YEnglish was invented by people, not computers, `+ d3 m2 z0 |0 x, Y e; r) o
And it reflects the creativity of the human race0 [+ k; }7 V% G7 O, }3 }, }
(Which of course isn't a race at all)7 D' Y, E' D+ R" u; ]" _6 j" @, h7 b
4 O! _- J c7 t7 l3 h0 | k7 NThat is why
0 v$ M# }& O6 d6 e* ^/ g/ i; AWhen the stars are out they are visible
# L8 v* C# T' f3 _1 ABut when the lights are out they are invisible$ X- p# o* z& E+ ~
And why it is that when I wind up my watch; ~" |/ y) e' C: K
It starts* d$ f8 c& X; N4 [6 |+ x1 l( G
But when I wind up this observation,
" }* ~( A1 u4 d- W; A) \It ends. |
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