 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 4 V0 A. m/ H# T3 _/ w4 j
0 T' \+ N3 x7 a9 i' m$ C
) d* Y+ R. x# I8 d- R" S; T- m. Z--------------------------------------------------------------------------------, k1 x) D) T0 V0 p$ C+ o
: m& y& f8 j* B3 p
- N: x/ O! H( W# V) `
( g, ?$ U Y6 s2 H3 x' q
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.6 b1 H7 o& b1 z; F( W
2 C4 \- K8 d; x9 |Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 4 W" v% S( G" z7 M
$ w) h( V1 c# V. R8 MIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
0 n- Y) T6 E; v c5 O( t5 s
2 }# O$ O/ D8 e9 G2 |Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
8 y2 _8 i5 L2 X. |make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
8 n5 R- [; f1 C( x M: d
8 o ^/ M. D) W! @0 mGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ) S7 c+ _' D- J/ H: c
U! I1 m' E. h$ S- ~Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
1 M2 s* D4 w' x: [7 k9 g# E4 Y) d7 a" ~
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.! P8 N, X; r' p6 G. g! E
2 h! b8 e% G' y* P; k& B) m9 LCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
9 m+ w# [ O/ t3 i3 j% p* q0 Z9 s P( x5 t$ F
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 5 c0 @% h# V; d* L
; | k0 ~1 l+ M1 T, x) PWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. : e# c, l3 |* O" E
4 b* A% V/ p) wRinse conditioner off hair.: X6 {( d$ @ A
( C7 @; H6 Z7 b# {* c1 r( U$ e/ q
Shave armpits and legs.0 g4 U* w2 [. R% B
1 M% |. G2 l6 h8 F; O9 g7 y
Turn off shower.: U9 j. m+ a. E8 t
* [" Y3 w' X7 H r$ L' ]9 k
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
3 f0 o' I. H2 z+ e/ A% o+ Q* Q6 q$ ^5 t7 ~
Spray mold spots with Tilex. 3 [9 S0 b, ]! O3 c3 s; {
& k* J/ n+ B1 D9 Z& X/ \% V
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. # T* m9 a1 B* G# R1 Y
1 P S/ f) F! Z9 o Z* p5 j# VWrap hair in super absorbent towel. / E# o( F, ?! k8 Q* W% r3 u; l
6 M! U% N6 z8 V& ~# n" cReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. ' a" w; w+ C- a" {2 Z3 Q
, I3 `; Y% q: ^If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
4 G# \$ @$ Z, A2 ^, Y+ t- M/ P! H. y& @% d' k3 ]
2 c2 t# c' K0 q' J A& r: m# Y$ ~
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
0 C" I# E1 g) d, Y+ o! @7 j+ Z4 g7 \/ Q, P$ {- _% L
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
. r. t& s& n( y4 K! H9 \; ]2 s" B; Y3 |. }" ~( j# f
Walk naked to the bathroom.
- i6 l' I8 P) A. q6 _7 t5 h
" a' V$ c' F! Y7 Y! S$ vIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 8 [; o' z! m" i+ d8 d' o2 A! q
1 O' j6 {2 d1 q' a2 d
Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 5 K/ r/ m5 Z+ j% ~( l/ `
: X3 z2 F$ L+ k7 A1 s* O8 j
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 3 b1 O" Z; ~. f P+ V
6 q( @, |# ~) T! a+ A( o+ \5 J) Z- \Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
' s9 K' I( `& Y( |, G& s( j; ~( _5 M- e+ e% e( D9 n- {4 d8 U' _! x
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 7 `0 o% [1 v0 Z- t& x, H5 c7 ?
( |' v. [5 F% x* y& Q# z$ b+ r
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
; c; z; H6 j; _! k3 l! |* x# i- h" V6 e2 P6 a+ l7 ^
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 5 u( w+ I8 G4 I) _; H! x
2 T; q$ E8 [, p. rWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
. Z2 y- w& S5 i. W# R e
. U& ~0 u2 d. c& W7 W; v6 C& I* OWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
/ A- R; q' |( h' R" B# V4 ]4 l0 ?- G* R
Pee. , L4 Z* U3 P5 { O
# k# f$ Y" L; h, u5 @$ Z# s, R" |Rinse off and get out of shower. 3 \0 z. h) g* {" F! C# M
9 p6 {7 ^% D6 l6 }8 J1 n9 U" r4 }
Partially dry off.8 c5 B' e0 R% f; X9 P' H. K
) N* R- { z. t. h7 r( G% e
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
* x, v, z$ {% o# P# D" ]1 w5 j$ w. g- d Y% H- x8 u
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
+ B9 ~8 V7 H Q4 w
" k; V& R1 U% {4 nLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. : l" k6 t$ k6 O9 [* ]. @ b2 b
3 a+ [/ q: p2 M$ I/ O0 p8 EReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. % R8 c3 v0 i1 I# R# r
+ X. D1 V& K7 }; A. v! U5 ~Throw wet towel on bed. 6 P Q+ h, l5 I2 ^( z
; \% x2 o$ F1 C0 oIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
