My Orifinal Writing for Criticizing 1

BOFA

The following is my original writing awhile ago replying to a friend's email.  I post it here for everyone to criticize. Any comment is welcome, but name calling or personal attacks. Also please be noticed that opinions expressed in the writing are solely personal, and supposedly not to be the part intended for judgment or discussion.
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Hi, If you are reading this, then it has at least two days passed since it was written, and what i am writing here or what i feel now has been in the history in my life. Am I right. Clock is ticking every second, and our life is fading away every second too, although 99% of people walking on the street are not aware of it but still having big plan for their big lives. What is life, anyway? Hit me and tell me, could you?

Everyone on this earth has his/her own dream of life, and each of them is so brave and ambitious at their early age, and been working so hard in faith spending most of his/her prime time of life away from their families and beloved. But everyone is going to suddenly
realize, one day in their 30's , that all is in vain, and, they are almost still where they were in the social hierarchy, feeding him/herself and families from hand to elbow with the above minimum pay that is still to be ripped off at least 1/3 as tax. so what you can do with your life and your DREAM? Tell me who is happier between a homeless and a hard working law-abiding CITIZEN? Who is happier, the dog or the people? Ha, Gotcha. I know you are going to say "But we have happy moments in our life", but you may forget the old
saying " A dog has his day". Compare the time and efforts you have to put to get those who-knows-when-is-to-come happy moments, a dog need not to do anything, but spend his whole life playing with no worries about bills, houses, kids, retirements, CPP, skyrocketing
1 V9 `) W; D" Y9 Khealth care cost, which party to vote for the next government, cars and gas price, about whether enough money to pay for a piece of turf as your grave to put your old sack after your end day. Happy vs. work?

/ r" |' h, r( K8 S4 b$ DFinally got to work out in the fitness club again this morning, and finally got myself sweatering. Everyone there was walking, running, or punching the hammers, ALONE, QUIET, with their earpieces over head and eyes staring at the dozen TV screens. No words between people, no hello, no smile. People think " I am exercising, I will be healthy, I am in the lifestyle". Right, lifestyle. Does anybody realize that a lifestyle like this is so boring to death? Imagining that everyone is like a muted horse working like a horse on a rancher, and you call it a lifestyle?? I believe mowing a lawn would have more fun than that. How desperate these people are? Imaging those who are horse-riding, can you call your exercising lifestyle??
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So sad being there for one and half hour without a word with nobody around, and nobody seemed to feel like talking to anyone else.
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PEOPLE ONLY MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS, WHAT IS IT?

8 x/ B1 g$ l) {what is it? com'n , forget about my rambles, enjoy your holidays with your families.

BOFA

Sorry, a typo in the title, it should be "Original", not "Orifinal".

StarHelena

你说的在GYM里别人不和你闲谈, 不知你是在哪个GYM, 反正我去的时候,如果对设备有什么疑问,好些人都会帮我, 也很愿意和我随便说两句, 只不过,在运动的过程中, 如果你边剧烈运动,边说话的话, 你自己试试看-----结果是, 呼吸极度困难,更别说和你交谈了,呵呵.
SO I SUGGEST YOU CHAT WITH SOMEONE WHO IS TAKING A REST.

BOFA

Thanks for your suggestion.

, g# l* Z4 q7 lI still think, based on my observation and understanding, that we can see it as a culture here that most of them people don't initiate a conversation with a stranger, most of the time, unless there is a trigger, or you meet a person who is very outgoing, which I met sometimes.

小老儿

try to think it in the other way, i mean, you could've been the 'very outgoing' person, right? and then, you will meet this person all the time.  i know this is easy to say and hard to do. but it is a way, indeed.

lader

我觉得你可以试着敞开心扉去接纳其他人，尤其像你提到的那些看上去比较冷漠的人们。我想改变自己不太正确的态度才是获得开心的秘诀